The Waddle

Along with my fashion-sense, I have also largely abandoned any semblance of grace when outdoors. In addition to the Dork Coat (even Ugly Betty looks cuter than me), I have taken to wearing boots, and several layers, including the occasional double-socks or double-pants. I feel like one of those kids in a snow suit who can't move without falling down. Since my legs are proportionately longer, I am able to move. I call it the Waddle. Not unlike a penguin, I waddle down the street. The puffiness of the coat keeps my arms away from my body (and frequently flailing to keep my balance). The layers make it harder to move well, especially since I can't always feel my legs anyways. Add to this the varying terrain. With the recent snow and cold, there is ice, there are unshoveled or slushy sidewalks and narrow pathways. This really does not increase that catwalk-like grace. I am sliding, skidding, and really doing whatever it takes not to fall on my well-padded ass, or the unsuspecting person in front of me.

However, the sun is peeking out. Next week is supposed to be above freezing. And all this snowy terrain is doing wonders for my inner thigh muscles. So once I shed all these damn layers, I might be hot. Or just overheated.

on Pandora: "Visiting Angels" - Roni Size