Sleep study

This sleep study is definitely one of the strangest things I have ever done. I had more test anxiety about the evening sleep test than about my SATs.

This is how it works: Arrive at the study center at 8.30 (it’s about an hour away from Athens). Fill out paperwork. Then the tech spends an hour gluing 25 sensors all over me. Literally. I counted. And the glue is the consistency of Crisco, and all up in my hair and face. All of the sensors are plugged into this box I can wear around my neck. Basically, I look like Frankenstein’s monster in jammies, and I feel like a human bomb. Add this to the fact that I can’t wash my face, which feels like an oil slick, probably from hanging out with the Crisco glue.

So they shove this thing up my nose and turn out the lights and expect me to fall asleep at 11PM. Given that I am a vampire, I am just getting started. But I can’t sit up, or wear my glasses, which seriously limits my options. And despite getting all excited about being able to watch Mystery Diagnosis, they’re all repeats.

In case being put to bed at 11PM wasn’t rough enough, they woke up me up at 5.30AM. I don’t even remember the last time I woke up that early. Stayed up that late, perhaps. It didn’t help that I spent most of the night worrying about ungluing one of the electrodes, or gluing my face to the pillow, or strangling myself with my wires. Oh, and knowing that someone was watching me “sleep,” albeit remotely and infrared.

Day study: Every 2 hours they let you take a 30 minute nap. One paper, this sounds awesome. In reality, it blows. Partially because I am so disoriented from the odd sleep schedule and no windows. Partially because I don’t take catnaps—I take lion naps. And partially because by the time the nap rolls around I am either finally awake or so stupid sleepy that 30 minutes won’t do. Oh, and it’s always less than 30 minutes. Grr.

It’s super frustrating because the room is really small, and I am still hooked up to my circuit box. Making most physical activity kinda impossible. Like I tried a bit of yoga but nearly gave myself a face-concussion with the box. So I am pretty much limited to the bed for movies/TV/book. Except for the fact that my Pavlovian response to reading is sleep. And because I don’t have a table or different, non-sleep space to read, it is pretty much impossible. Did I mention the total lack of internet?! So much for getting work done. Because I look like a messy freak, I don’t want to walk around outside the little blue room. The sleep center is attached to the normal offices, and shares a bathroom. And nothing says socially-awkward like padding into the bathroom in your jammies with your doctor and a new patient walking by. And sharing a wall with a coffee maker is such a tease.

I had made this deal with myself that after this I got to go to Target (it’s the closest one to Athens), but looking and feeling as gross as I do, I think I will ask for a paper bag, cut eye-holes out, and dash to my car to drive back to my shower in Athens. On the plus side, I think I figured out how to pay for a Wii.

Nice weather+free time = Productive

At first I thought it was the holiday weekend, but that wouldn't make any sense, since the point of holidays is to chill. I have my first tan/burn lines from reading outside. It's a bit tricky when you don't have someone to slime you, but Spamber recommends the spray slime. With all this gorgeous weather, I have all the windows open. My apartment smells fresh, with the airflow and all the laundry and dishes done.

Yesterday, I was burning through my to-do list, today I headed back out to the river trail for some intervals. I heart my iPod. The only bummer is that part of the pretty weather is the pollen count. So as I am busting into a run, I basically am inhaling/swallowing lots of pollen. So most of my sprints end in some hacking/choking as I catch my breath and cope with the infusion off crap in my lungs. But it's too damn gorgeous to think twice about it!

on the Tube: Dodgers @ Cubs in the top of the 6th.

Downtime with the Designers

The past week has been largely populated with dinners and playtime with the designers. And designers are more fun to play with anyways. It's the end of the quarter, and most of the designers are shipping out early for various summer gigs around the country (Colorado Shakes was this weekend's exodus).

Tuesday night was the weekly BBQ out with the horses. I think Tuesdays are the new Fridays, because Fives were dwindling, largely because everyone was in the theatre or totally wiped out. So there were a dozen people eating tacos and having appropriately inappropriate dinner conversation. And I was rendered speechless, which amused Smokin' Fairy to no end.

Wednesday we all headed out to Dash-M's gorgeous house for some jumbalaya and Rock Band. Smokin' Fairy set up the equipment, while the rest of us assembled the most amazing fresh fruit salad! 3 kinds of berries, kiwi, pineapple, watermelon. A veritable rainbow of fruit goodness. The jumbalaya was damn tasty too. Nothing overdressed. Just perfectly spiced rice, chicken and sausage. And Rock Band with all 5 players until our fingers fell off. Basically, we just determined if the volume or rock-out enthusiasm was too high if it freaked out the dog. And then I got to try MarioKart for Wii. Which is so going to be my graduation present to myself.

Thursday was the season finale of Grey's, so Smokin' Fairy and Ms. Smokin' Fairy headed over with pizza. And when the Honda commercial involving a guy encased in cement came on, she and I totally lost it.

Friday was a small Fives out near Albany. Which basically involved Riff's "extra crispy" hot dogs and Trivial Pursuit - Pop Culture edition. Riff, "Doug," G.Style and me coming from behind, once we really had the pie hunger. Oh, and there was this amazing chipotle hummus. We adjourned, and I headed out to the Gator to meet up with some different faces.

And last night, to avoid the speakers as big as me that were perched across the driveway, I got to have BW3 with Lil Sis and G.Style before heading out to see the new Indiana Jones. Which I was willing to let slide until the monkey scene. Oy!

But now that our numbers are dwindling, things will probably quiet down, letting me go back to work, the library and my loser evenings in front of the tube. It was a nice week after finishing an intense week of thesis.

on the Toob: SVU marathon!

TPRC - Telepresence Research Collaboration

Tonight the @Lab staged their telepresence event. The idea is to merge live performances in 2 different locations into a single web-broadcast, using Skype, AIM, webcams, etc. Combining video and audio components. We had tap dancers in one place reacting to a beat from a DJ in another place. With other synthesizers, keyboards, guitars.

OK. In theory, this was really cool. In reality, it was kind of a cluster&^$%. Lots of cable run, electrical cacophony, disorganization. The Union Arts location reeked of boy funk. The @Lab was crowded with a bunch of people who wanted to participate or spectate. Too many musicians, not enough organization.

Originally, I was supposed to be in on the artistic team. I suggested contact improvisation (the whole point is to adapt to a constantly changing environment. And then you could motion-capture if you wanted). But I never heard of anything else. Then I found out they needed a stage manager (from Smokin' Fairy who was doing most of the engineering for it). I'm still not sure what my duties are/were beyond moral support and pizza pickup, but hey. If nothing else, this project was nothing like anything I have ever done - theatre and dance are different animals.

Now I do some dishes and prep for my defense.

on the Toob: SVU

Poetry

2 shots of espresso and 2 refills of coffee
no place open at 5.15AM when i finally realise that i'm hungry
birds are chirping, but the steady rain is oddly zen and focusing
1 conclusion and infinite finesses left to do
T minus 8 hours and counting
oh gloria, i will survive
in one piece or many
but hopefully showered

on iTunes: "Lovely Head" - Goldfrapp

Mad thing

The fact that I slept through Theater History today should have been a clue that I should just stay in bed all day. And even on my worse vampire night, I have never missed class. So much so that my MA "Little Sister" actually came to my house and called to make sure I was ok. Not even the bright green pants could save that one.

For a few hours, I pretty much was in constant motion. When I got up at noon, I was shuffling around. Spent an hour at the Convo Center dealing with the Research & Creative Expo. First I didn't have a display board to use. Then when I got the board, it was too damn big to fit into the car. So in the end, I used a whole hour and accomplished nothing. Raced over to my thesis meeting, which of course was positive, but I still have alot of work to do in less than two days. Ran up to the CAD lab to print stuff for my Deathtrap presentation. Ran back downstairs to give my advisor a title for my thesis (so hate titles). Ran up to the lobby to meet my actors, then find space, take photos for my thesis. Actually, this part was fun. My two actors were really easygoing and ready to try anything. I just wish I had more time to actually teach them some tango. Then assemble Deathtrap packets. This was 4.30 when I was done.


My judging time at the Expo was 5.45 with nothing printed. I totally forgot that judging was tonight. I have also been so damn preoccupied with my thesis, I wasn't as on top of things as I would have liked. By the end of the run-around, I was pretty much ready to let things slide, but the only thing that would drive me more crazy than winging-it would be blowing it off entirely.

Blew home, inhaled a slice of pizza and half a beer, photoshopped some images. Dashed over to Kinkos, where a very nice lady helped me. Waited for some stoner to finish with the paper cutter. Rush to Kantner to print text off a Mac. Then fly over to the Convo as I frantically post my stuff, throw up my display as my judges politely stall.


I guess I really wanted to do this because I am really proud of the quality, quantity and breadth of work I did on Macbett. And the images are awesome.

But actually, my day was pretty much saved by the weekly BBQ out with the cows. Yummy (free) food, snarking with people, and having my favorite beer. On one hand, I could have used those 3 hours stressing about my thesis, but somehow, I think this was a better use of time actually. Now I just make a pot of coffee and wait for the thesis to slow down enough for me to get at it.

Stalking my thesis

My relationship with my thesis has turned adversarial. I am trying to sneak up on it to tackle it, wrestle it into submission, then make it pretty. I have discovered that Thesis tends to let its guard down around 2AM. My weapon of choice is my new green pen and heavy objects to hold down said thesis, lest it try to escape.

Currently, I am on hold with the Annex, being subjected to the Muzak version of Phantom, which I don't particularly love in the original. I am trying to track down a back issue of a periodical, because the original request got lost. And the library doesn't understand why I am miffed that it takes a week to be told they can't find what is a primary source that needs to be included in my thesis, which has to be printed and in the hands of my committee by 1PM Friday. I am about to put on the bitch boots and find the damn thing myself.

Also, let me tell you what I think of MLA right about now. Inconsistent, trivial and generally a pain in my ass. The Writing Center and I looked up how to cite non-text media, and found about 3 different variations. There's no point in buying the MLA style guide, because they keep changing it, or contradicting themselves. Reminiscent of my uniquely Classical problem of who to cite - the original Greek author, the translator, or the editor of the anthology.

Currently trying to schedule a photoshoot for my thesis, and sweet talk TAD into letting me include the images as "figures" within the body of the text, because I hate appendices.

OK. I think they found my book. Now I need to find shoes and get over there before they lose it again.

All dressed up

After spending weeks in paint-spatter, blacks or jammies, opening night provides the perfect opportunity to prove that you are capable of looking like a stylin' adult. We're talking laundry, mandated-showers, ties and heels. It's quite the sight to behold.

Friday night, I was very sad I forgot my camera, because the students of the School of Theater were looking pretty damn hot. I saw a pimp suit (on the most unlikely person), a guy with better legs than me in a mini-sweater dress, shoes I covet. And I busted out the nice jewelry and makeup. And apparently shocked the hell out of people by wearing a skirt.

I saw the first act of Knock Me a Kiss, which I thought was pretty good. I was more excited at the turn out of people, particularly students, admittedly most of whom were SOT. There were a couple of moments I liked, and the actor playing DuBois has a gorgeous voice. Maybe this week in my ushing adventures, I will see the second half! Before it's big NY transfer!

on Pandora: "An Honest Mistake" - The Bravery

A walk on the wildside

or Palmer/Mill.
Sometime around 11AM the ambient street noise started. Not unlike the Amnesty festival last Saturday. And I suspect it won't die down until tomorrow.



Palmerfest has vomited all over my neighborhood. There are cheap beer cans, drunk hoochies and red frat cups everywhere. The stench of Natty Light and boy funk wafts up the street with a good breeze. And as a diversion from my thesis, I decided to take a walk, and my camera. It was pretty damn amazing. People on houses, dueling cover bands, and the street the cops have pretty much given up on. All of the houses are overflowing with people, and are all clearly marked with their token "You must be 21 to drink" signs. And some other klassy signs as well. Best guess - either the beginning or the end of Greek week. All I know is that it is a big enough party that the Burrito Buggy has relocated from the corner of University/Court to Stimson/Palmer.

But it does make me miss all the street fests in Chicago during the summer. Every weekend was another event, which forced you to be outside and social. But they all had much better beer options.

But it's a good day. Sunny. My Cubbies won again. And hopefully I will get back to Chicago in a couple of weeks.

on Pandora: "Pieces of the People We Love" - the Rapture

Overreacting

Some things really shouldn't bother me as much as they do. Especially when they aren't my problem.

Situation #1. Sitting outside on the Virgin blanket with my Said primer. Nothing like some light reading while sunning/photosynthesizing. Overhear fight between girl and boy. Basically, she does alot of nice girlfriendly things for him, and he doesn't acknowledge it because (and this is a direct quote) "I'm just not that kind of guy." There was a fight. And what I really wanted was to go up to this girl, calmly explain that she was being completely reasonable, and PS, this guy is a turd who should be flushed promptly.

OK. I don't know why exactly this bothered me as much as it did. It's not my problem. Maybe it's all my feminist theory. Or the fact I have a few years on her. But fundamentally, I hate the idea that this guy thinks his behavior is acceptable, and that this girl will continue to let other people treat her like crap. But since I have a hard enough time not being inappropriate, I decided not to make it worse than it already was. Although when I saw the punk in the library it took every ounce of self-restraint not to share some of my views with him.

Situation #2. Apparently Blockbuster thinks I have profoundly bad taste in movies and that I am too irresponsible to return my stuff on time. I noticed two charges on my Visa from a Blockbuster store that I have not been to in YEARS. Call them. They said they initially charged me a late fee for Apocalypto. Do I LOOK like someone who would give my money to Mel Gibson to watch some racist epic? Then they realised their error and refunded MOST of the money. The guy didn't understand why I was so upset about $1.32 that I was out for a non-refundable "restocking fee." Here's a thought - I never rented the damn movie in the first place? At a store that is hundreds of miles away? It's $1.32 to you, but coffee/life blood to me. I have since canceled my membership; encouraged others to do so as well (and take a careful look at their credit card statements); and I will be writing a marissa-special letter to them when I am done with the thesis.

But I have set up my UCSB account, found some great new sources for the thesis, which I hate less now.

Drunk mommies

This weekend featured not one, but two big OU traditions/events - Palmerfest and Mom's Weekend. Palmerfest is pretty much a ginormous block party. Living in the middle of party central, I was really afraid of the possibilities Palmerfest presented. I had visions of all day-night parties, loud/bad music and evidence of puking. Fortunately, this was less of an issue since I spent most of the weekend in Nelsonville working on the dance show.

What I was not prepared for - Mom's weekend. I didn't realise what a huge event this was. I expected lots of brunches and such. But driving the stage manager, I saw a peek of Court Street, which was mobbed. So Smokin' Fairy, one of the LDs and I headed there for some spectating. The boys got felt up. I took my camera. It was hilarious. Drunk mommies everywhere! All the alcoholic apples falling not too far from their trees. Drunk mommies and daughters shuffling. Drunk mommies being taken home by frat boys. Girls so hooched out and smokerly they are mistaken for moms. Oh the frivolities.

(frat boy with SOMEONE'S mom)

"Native" pride

Just read an article on chicagoist about local bars that made the 125 Places to Get a Beer Before You Die list. And I have been to 3, drunk the product of a 4th. I shouldn't be as pleased as I am. But blame Kallisti.

It was almost as satisfying as getting a little snotty with some punk trying to hit on me with his vast Chicago knowledge. Talking about he works in Chicago every summer, when he means Evanston (it's close but NO cigar). How suburban of him. Then he bragged about going drinking in "Cubbyville". To which I had to ask, "And where is that?" He meant Wrigleyville (which is not my favorite place to go drinking, unless you WANT to get felt up by a frat boy). I couldn't resist calling him out on his stuff because he was just so pleased with himself.

I miss the city and hope to get back for Mayfest and a Cubs game in a month or so. Because nothing beats Chicago in the summer!

on Pandora: "New Genious" - Gorillaz

My theatre roots

This week I picked up a gig working on a dance show in Nelsonville, which has been a nice diversion (and source of income). Factory Dance is putting on their spring concert, and I am the backstage manager. And unofficial ME.

Monday night, I spent a few hours hanging a mutating light plot. This involved 3 electrics on stage, some really ancient equipment and the perpetual challenge of finding enough circuits for everything. I had the stage manager, the facilities manager, and a couple of volunteers. I love having volunteers, but I hate just having them stand around, so I sort of took charge, by assigning tasks. I don't think that is technically what I supposed to do, but it needed to get done. My only regret is not taking the time to teach the volunteers with more accuracy, although I am always a proponent of "Get-it-done" theatre. For focus, I was in the air with my 6", and the 4 of us knocked out focus in about 90 minutes. It was so much fun to be an electrician again! It's been ages since I got to do much wrench-slinging.

Now that everything is in the air, I am settling in to my backstage manager role. It's mostly herding. I had braced myself for much worse, but the tech schedule was perfectly constructed, I had teachers rather than parents backstage with the little ones, and at one point we were even ahead of schedule! However, since it has also been a while since I did stage management, I forgot supplies last night. So I have a nice long list of crap to pack tonight, including a vacuum cleaner, which isn't usually on the list, but when you have 15 little butts sitting on a NASTY area rug, it makes the list. Also have to remember the dance-specific stuff (barf bucket, ice pack, safety pins). But all in all, backstage is quiet, the rehearsals are running pretty smoothly so far, even if a bit long.

The dancing looks pretty good. The little tappers in their polka dots are adorable, even if it does minorly freak me out that they are dancing to "Straight Up" by Paula Abdul. A couple of the pieces are really cool. And one of the little girls looks exactly like my friend from pre-school.

Another funny part of this - I am working closely with two of my former students. Who I have always liked. I try to resist the temptation to be my bossy self, but sometimes it is called for and sometimes it's inappropriate. If the lighting designer needs a boot to the head to get back into gear, then a boot to the head I will provide. But the stage manager was one of my favorites from a past discussion section. Probably the calmest, lowest maintenance actor, super-intelligent and on the ball. Also makes carpooling easy since we're all at Kantner all the time anyways.

on iTunes: "Ghetto Ways" - Scissors for Lefty

Thesis vacation

After I submitted the rough draft of my thesis on Friday afternoon, I took a thesis vacation. Refused to think about it, mostly because I was so thoroughly disgusted with it. I have the love/hate relationship going on with it. Sometimes I love it, sometimes I hate it. Sometimes I feel both at the same time.

Friday and Saturday were total slug days. Spent alot of time lying around, watching movies. Played some Portal. It was nice to take some time off from writing or thinking too hard. Got to take a long, leisurely shower. Washed some dishes, enjoyed running the vacuum entirely too much, made some lists. Started easing back into work today. Getting back into some theory. If it was slightly warmer, I would have sat outside on my blanket in a bikini and read my radical feminism. Not particularly because I relish the bikini-ness, but I do love the irony.

OK. Now to send emails to my students.

Grumpy pants

OK. So Grumpy Pants aren't the best look for a Friday, but they have kinda glued themselves to my ass.

1. Currently staring down my thesis draft. and all I see is a pile of turd. Like it's embarrassing to think of other people reading it. Especially when those people are so damn nice and supportive and will do their best to find something redeeming about it instead of just acknowledging its turd-ness.
1. part of the problem is that I am so acutely aware of its turd-ness I can't even fix anything. I know this doesn't have to suck, but at this point, I'm not sure how to close the gap between what it is and what it can be.
2. I hate being an agency-obsessed perfectionist. Which is only exacerbated by my compulsive procrastination.
   
2. I want to call Semester at Sea and check on the status of my application, because "In Progress" means nothing to me. But for the same reasons I don't make alot of these "proactive" calls, I don't want to scare people with my enthusiasm. I do not need any help being labeled the crazy one.
3. The apartment is squalid, but apparently not enough to motivate me to clean it. Just grouse about the state.
4. In my attempts to focus on my thesis I only confirmed my old fart-ness by calling the cops on a party. In my defense - it was after midnight, on a now Friday morning, and I could hear the lyrics of some bad Whitney Houston song with all the windows closed and my music on.
5. Smokin' Fairy says that I am Lexie from Grey's because I am nesty and neurotic. I guess I am glad that I am also a character who would steal a TV if it wasn't bolted to the wall, or not cry-faced Meredith.
   

But it is gorgeous outside, and a bit warm for grumpy pants, so I may have to change into something else. And the disgruntled shorts are in the wash.

Flashback

Spring time means open windows. Open windows mean warm breezes, fresh air, and the sounds of everyone else's music tastes. I don't know if it some faux mellowness on my part, but it's not too bad. About an hour ago, someone had parked their stereo speakers next to their window to play the music while they were grilling. And it was Weezer's Blue album. OK. I love this album. It's fun. And without even thinking about it, I was thoroughly enjoying myself. Until I realised how slightly odd it was for college kids to play that album. I'm not trying to limit anyone in their tastes, especially when Weezer is such a fun band. But the album came out in the mid-nineties. These kids were maybe in 1st grade. The only thing weirder is the fact that I was learning to drive to this music. My old fart-ness sneaks up on me. But I'd much rather hear me some Weezer or Offspring than bad frat music or loud rap. Currently someone with a drumkit is wailing on it with mixed results. Then again, it's so damn nice out, I am totally willing to enjoy it.

But that way, I didn't have to worry about music to cook to. Made turkey burgers with jack, and mashed sweet potatoes. Wanted to round out with broccoli, but it wasn't looking so good. Now to scope out a vacuum (now that I am running around barefoot, I am way more aware of the yukkies). Oh, right, and finish the draft of my thesis. So if you have seen my slacker muse, put her in a fairy-cab and send her my way. All I can say is that chyck had better have been stuck in jury duty or someone's glove compartment or something...

Feist

Currently, I am snickering to Born Yesterday. Damn clever for a dumb broad. The original Legally Blonde. I love me some Judy Holliday.

Last night, the MAs took a field trip to get some lively culture. Dinner and milkshaky drinks then a concert at MemAud. Of course, musictoday tried to screw me. I thought I had bought the tickets back in February, but apparently it didn't go through. Fortunately, we were able to buy tickets at the door. The opener was pretty lame. I suspect his entire lack of stage presence was part of his shtick. However, it was totally worth it for Feist. Whimsical, entertaining, talented. Not a dance around and scream concert. But given that the lead singer was losing her voice, it was good that it was more of a sit down and enjoy the quiet charm. I was really impressed at how multi-talented the musicians were. So many different, interesting instruments - bells, Irish drum, different horns, etc. And there were 2 visual artists upstage playing shadow games on an overhead projector. Lots of nature imagery. Little girl with lots of presence.

How fun to hear and see something so beautiful structured that is so playful. Reminds me of Devon Sproule with more toys. I think it will make great driving music.

My love affair with Brecht

To combat the last post, I will rhapsodize on a German theatre theorist.

Crash course in Bertolt Brecht: German playwright/director/theorist who did alot of work in the 1920s-50s. Developed the concept of Epic Theatre, Berliner Ensemble. Wrote Caucasian Chalk Circle, Mother Courage, Threepenny Opera. And the more I learn about this guy and his work, the more I love it.

I first learned about Brecht in my freshman seminar at William and Mary. It was also my first taste of dramaturgy. Read alot of his plays and theory. While I intelligently understood his work, I can't say I totally loved it. However, the more I read it, the better I like it. Did up a whole directorial packet for Mother Courage for URTAs, and the whole play was illuminated when I learned that Anne Bancroft played the title character on Broadway. The concept was brilliant, lots of WWI art. And today's lecture made it even better. Meryl Streep as adapted by Tony Kushner (two of my absolute favorite, most intelligent theatre artists). Very comic/musichall. Which opens all sorts of new possibilities.

Also, the more I learn about Epic Theatre, the more I realise that it is how I identify with and process theatre/art. As an artist and scholar, I find that exciting. That I have matured in my tastes and sensibility. It informs what I do and how I do it. While I still wouldn't consider myself a political theatre person (in general, I don't particularly like art that delights in its politicalness), I do feel that I am more aware. Or at least I hope so. I think it's also why I have developed such a taste for modern art. It doesn't try to replicate some artificial reality. It is provocative and visceral (well, the good stuff is. the bad stuff just provokes giggles.)

OK. My theatre geek self is going to walk itself to the post office.

on iTunes: "Head Over Heels" - Tears for Fears

Cubbie Sunday

Quite by accident, today has become a Cubbie Sunday. Woke up just in time for the end of the national anthem at Wrigley. It wasn't even like I had planned on watching the game; I just turned on the TV for ambient teeth-brushing noise. And Cubs games make awesome ambient noise. Since I wrote some thesis last night and it was raining to hard to walk up to the library, I just flopped onto the couch and watched the Cubs spank the Pirates. It feels awesome to loaf on the squishy couch, dozing, listening to the thunder. So much better than religiously checking my Cub widget.

When I got home from mass, nuked some Indian for dinner, turned on the ambient noise, and it is the WGN 60th Anniversary special on the Cubs. It's so funny, because I have only been a fan for a year, but it is so much fun, so exciting. Good thing to have on in the background as I prep my menu and calendar for the week. Good to do sun salutations and stretches to. Good to sort through paperwork to. At least until after gym prime time hours.

There is something about Cubbie ball in particular (I don't find other games as much fun), and especially home games (with the ivy and Eamus Catuli sign), that is oddly familiar because its theatrical. Great energy, emotion, positivity. More than anything, it's the sense of community. Like everyone is in on it or something. It's sort of like opening night, because regardless of the miserable details, people are present and collective and such.

Summer job?

As I face the looming realities of summer, I realise that I need to get off my butt and find a job. I HATE looking for a job almost as much as I hate being unemployed. I have alot of variables and hindrances to reconcile. Do I move back to Chicago, pay double rent, and hopefully get a steady temp gig? Do I move into my parents' house, hope to find a job and simultaneously NOT go crazy? Do I sit in my nice, pre-paid apartment in Athens and do nothing? I would love to do a theatre gig, but since I graduate in mid-June, that eliminates alot of Memorial Day-start opportunities. mef.

I am thinking about trying to housesit for a UVA professor and maybe live/work in Charlottesville again. Not that the jobs are all that well-paying, but I love me some Charlottesville, esp the fireworks. It would be the first time I would be living "at home" in a while. And I could be back with some of my friends and family and surrogate pets and the dumpling shop. In terms of low-key, it is really appealing.

But last night, around 3AM, I submitted my application for another job, which is either AWESOME, or secretly hellish. Interport Lecturer for Semester at Sea. Basically, I would present lectures on the various ports we would stop in, offering my own perspective, as well as a general and interesting overview. I would live on a cruise ship and see a bunch of places in Europe I haven't seen. And ISTANBUL!!!! I could also be surrounded by a bunch of spoiled rich kids, no internet, and seasick for 2 months. I am really excited about the IDEA, but I still need to find out more. Like if I can even get the job. (which P.S. I am the perfect candidate for, given my grad student status, styles of research, travel and professional experience, etc.) And I look great on a boat.


It seems like an almost valid diversion from my thesis. Which has 5 days to be made into a first draft. But currently I lack that inspiration to write. Like I have no idea what to say. Maybe another cup of coffee and more tango music will light that fire.

on iTunes: "Desencuentro" - Tango Argentino OST

Token feminist

It would appear that the MAs have developed a reputation for being the disgruntled, overanalytical students who suck out the fun. In particular, I have become the resident feminist. This week, we read the longest running plays of the 1930s - Tobacco Road and Life With Father. Possibly the two most offensive things I have read in a while. Nearly broke the spine of one script, and spent hours wanting to punch Father in the kidneys. Tobacco Road is so singularly grotesque, disgusting with no one redeemable about the characters. But it gave me a chance to look up some more fun diseases like Pellagra. Life With Father just made me hissing angry at this patriarchical, control-freak jerk. So when someone tried to say that he was just misunderstood, my hand shot up so fast it made people across the room laugh. There was hissing and spitting and white-knuckle gripping of the chair as I fought the temptation to spew hate and gender theory. I can only hope what I consider a firmly anchored feminist consciousness mixed with either sleep-deprivation or a caffeine buzz, comes off as endearingly amusing or even thought-provoking instead of bat-shit crazy. Although I hear that bat-shit crazy looks good on me, maybe less so when it flies out of my mouth unhindered by things like social appropriateness or volume control. I must look like some Tourette's patient covered in cookie crumbs as I twitch and mutter a$$@.

Oh well. I am pretty unafraid to express myself. I love hearing what the playwrights have to say, and it's fun to be in class with some of the actors who provide a totally different response. I'm just visceral and uncensored. This may require a permanently sharpied public apology on my forehead.

Adding to the fun - I was having one of those mornings. Nothing like staring in front of the closet wondering what goes with khaki. And then when I go to put on my new khakis, I realise that I had my shoes on. Crap. I managed to look impressively adult for being so out-of-it.

Old Lady

It's never good when you go to bed a college student and wake up an old lady.

This morning I had my first mammogram. Strictly preventionary, taking advantage of my insurance. Mostly just to get a baseline reference. The suite was very careful to create a sense of privacy, no pink or crap. But it's still weird. Especially since I don't even have an A-cup to lay on to the little table. It seemed like the waste of a whole Xray film. But still jostled and mushed. I feel like a woman. Let me add this to the list of charming "grownup girl" experiences like shaving my legs, plucking my eyebrows and the annual appointment that makes me glare at my ovaries.

Got home and decapitated strawberries to put on my bran flakes. Shut up. They are cheap and filling. What makes me an old lady - they are oddly tasty.

Also, I think I might have been the oldest person at the barbeque that involved Smirnov Ice that tasted like candy and various grilled proteins. And AWESOME stories about dates gone wrong, and shop malfunctions. And drunkenly-constructed wedding dress plans.

Then I headed to Donkey to work on theses with the other MA. It was funny to be the grownup. And apparently Beck is the music of choice for the midnight oil, since we heard it at Donkey and pouring out of the Studio Art building at the bottom of the hill.

on the tube: SVU before more thesis

the $8.98 button

The only thing I like better than buying things I don't need is spending money I don't have. Ah.

Well, I sorta needed pants that fit. Because jammer pants aren't really socially acceptable, no matter how comfy. And Smokin' Fairy needed cargos. So we headed over the river to Parkersburg, WV which has more shopping options than Walmart.

Let me tell you how much I love Steve & Barry's. They have normal looking and even cute clothes. And everything in the store right now is $8.98. Cute black dresses, jeans, shoes. Ended up with a couple pairs of khakis and a cool blue shirt. To wear with my new wedges, (cheaper in store than online)which I bought in an attempt to look more like a grownup, despite the fact that Smokin' Fairy is totally certain I will never wear them.

Smokin' Fairy and I were delighted by the $8.98ness of it all, complete with the idea of extensive training on a single $8.98 button. Heh. Add that to the list of other fun, like the Jesus of Nazareth - Frat Boy webisodes (he turns water into beer!).

Now I fight the fatigue to do work. With Top Chef Chicago in the background making mildly homesick.

Mef

I realise that I have been a blog slacker. But this month, my days consist of sleeping too much and too often, running back and forth from the library, complaining about dishes, and not writing very much. It's really dull and frustrating. Even when I think I have something to say, what should be pages is more like sentences. Smokin' Fairy has been doing his best to keep me from working too hard. Like bringing over pizza and Fight Club, which I FINALLY saw last night. It was awesome, and I would like to thank all of humanity for not telling me anything about it other than that I would totally dig it. Fight Club = dug! Basically, until May, I am officially lame and mildly annoyed.

on iTunes: "I Am the Walrus" - Bono and the Secret Machines from Across the Universe

(which is spectacular!!!)

Drumline Madness

Wet wood

This writer's block is driving me crazy.

My thesis draft is due in 3 weeks. Which SOUNDS like a lot of time, but really isn't. Especially since the hours and days keep flying by without anything being produced. And I have a deadline every week.

I have given up on inspiration, and procrastination isn't an option. So I am trying some new tactics: listening to tango music; typing all my tango notes; drinking lots of coffee (which is rapidly turning yucky). I have my outline posted next to my desk, complete with page guidelines. But despite all these accelerants, nothing has really caught my brain on fire. It's like my brain is just a pile of wet twigs and mud. No matter what you do to it, it will not catch fire. It might smolder for a second and then re-extinguish. GRR! What I need is a nice thick log, properly dried hardwood, ideally fragrant that will burn consistently for a good while.

Smokin' Fairy has offered to watch some tango with me, to see if it would help to watch/explain tango to the uninitiated. And I have a Donkey date with the other MA who is also in the writing process. If anyone has any ideas or inspiration, I will cheerfully accept.

on iTunes: some random Argentine

Glory Box

cf: Hope Chest

Tonight, I got to see solo performance artist Tim Miller perform his show Glory Box at the Forum. Yes, here in little Athens, a real, live, exciting and controversial performance artist! One of the NEA 4 whose grant was revoked by Jesse Helms et al because the work was deemed an inappropriate use of tax monies because of its gay themes.

The show: alternately funny, insightful, risque but always brilliant and thought-provoking. I love performance art for its magnifying-glass attention to detail. One man's experience of discrimination against LGBT, but packaged in something terribly clever and interesting. He recalls his mother's Hope Chest and what that meant to him growing up. All the way up to the reality of being forced to leave this country because his partner has been denied a visa.

The talkback: How exciting to see activism in action! How exciting to see how art can be more than something pretty to look at! People signed petitions for the Uniting American Families Act, a bill in Congress that would allow for same-sex couples in which one was a non-national be allowed to stay in the country ala marrying for a green card. He talked about his own experiences, encouraged us to make our own. And really opened up the idea of glory box.

The theatre as glory box. A place in which you keep things that will be useful and relevant later. A place where your energies and hopes for the future are stashed. A vital space. And in my own geeky way, I can only hope that I help to contribute to that, since one of the things I love most about theatre is that it is one of the few places that is still safe for experimentation. A place to experiment with social ideas and identities within the safety of the confines and context of theatre.

Nefarious plotting

This quarter, I have a new guy subleasing the apartment with which I share a wall. The same quarter I need to write my thesis. This would be the day I live next door to a glorified frat boy. He permanently plays his music at 11. Even the freakin' Beatles. And while I love me some Beatles, I don't love it when I can here the lyrics while I am in the shower! So I have nicknamed my neighbor Thumper or Thumpy when I am being extra affectionate.

Unlike so many frat boys, this one believes in vacuuming. At 2AM. Probably before his drunk friends come over to hang out under my window. And talk loudly. Making fun of me. They party every night. The leave cheap beer cans on my car, and block the drive way. This is so many flavors of uncool. I am glad this guy only has 6 credits this quarter as an undergrad, but I have 18 and a thesis to write.

Since I refuse to move into the library while this guy lives his frat boy fantasy, I have tapped into my creative resources. Theatre people are both evil and creative. We also have access to seriously cool tools. Like killer amps, serious soldering irons and bright lights. Smokin' Fairy wants to set up some sound system against our shared wall and blare the most annoying music thinkable. Still taking suggestions. Doing it bug bomb style - set it off and get the hell out. G.Style recommended a weasel, as an homage to Big Lebowski. And the black militant playwright recommended calling in a drug raid, since inevitably that would ruin his night, and he probably has some anyways.

Even the fam is getting in on it! While I plan on trying to be the decent human, it is a little easier to to so with such bits of evil percolating.

WHOA!

I always knew I looked like my mom, but this is scary.

Spendy

Maybe by laying down some of this text, I will be inspired to write some thesis text.

I am not sure what it is, but of late, I have been extra spendy. Over break I realised how much I needed new clothes, which resulted in a shirt, 2 pairs of pants (one GREEN pair because the red was just too much look), a skirt and a purple dress. Of course, now I need the perfect white blouse and shoes and .... Coming back from Spring Break, I had a bag just full of books that I either bought or borrowed. Even stupid stuff like hair product looks good. Which is funny, since I have no more money now than I did when it was dark and cold.

Another thing I get spendy about - noise cancelling headphones. Apparently the apartment sharing my wall has been sublet to a frat boy who pumps the bass on EVERYTHING (Beatles? Seriously?) and who likes to have loud drunken 2AM pow-wows under my window on a Tuesday morning. And I guess the people across the driveway have started taking drum lessons. And this would happen when I need to write my thesis. In case I wasn't already easily-distracted. I may have to find some super-secret hidey-hole or just move in to Donkey.

on iTunes: Soma FM Downbeat House

Spring quarter starts

I don't know if it's the warmer weather or what, but today I have been super motivated with the beginning of spring quarter. New classes, getting into a routine again, such as it is. I only have one officially scheduled class. Very open schedule to allow for my thesis, which is still giving me the willies.

Got up a little early, hit the library twice, crossed a bunch of stuff of my list. And I feel like really eating decent food and going to the gym. We'll see how long that lasts. Still plowing through my tango books. Nothing like procrastinating on my thesis by reading stuff for my thesis.

Reconvene at the Gator

There are two primary joys of spring break - leaving town/work for a few days to do something totally different or the same at a different pace, and the social reconvening the night before classes.

Last night, people were trickling back into town and gravitating to the Gator, which is our bar of choice. I didn't even realise how many people were there until I got there and saw the whole crowd. Everyone was excited to see people, had new things to talk about instead of rehashing old bitcheries, very relaxed. Somehow the drinks just tasted better, the jokes were funnier, and all was right in the world. There were lots of drinks, group shots, and plans to sell plasma to the vampires in a pyramid scheme.

Winter quarter is notoriously crappy and a thing to survive, so if people weren't glad to be back, they were at least glad it was no longer winter quarter. There's plenty of work to do this quarter, but more people want to play, and take dance lessons. Woo! In the meantime, I have two books to finish, a CFP to submit and a syllabus to develop. Ideally by tomorrow. *snerk*

on iTunes: "Yes Sir I Can Boogie" - Goldfrapp

Dogsitting

Technically, it's actually pet sitting, but Catface is so low-maintenance, I spend much more time with Bachus. He's part beagle, part lab, and part crazy. But fun.

I got back to Athens yesterday, just as Smokin' Fairy headed out, so I get to look in on the animals. Bachus is just such a perky, jumpy dog. Last night, we watched House (he sat on my lap, all 70lbs of him), then I worked on my drumming skills in Rockband. On the easiest songs and easiest setting, I am pretty good. He runs all over the yard, and is very good about responding when he is called.

Today, I got up at 7.30AM to let the dog out so he doesn't explode. Then this afternoon, after everyone had lunch, Bachus and I went for a ride. He loves the car and couldn't get more excited, sticking his nose through the cracked windows or sunroof, jumping around all over the car. Headed up to Stroud Run, which muchly reminds me of Walnut Creek in Charlottesville, only even further out. I have never been out there before, which was evidenced by the "scenic" route we took. I pretty much just gaged how close I was based on the pooch's excited panting in my ear. Unfortunately, there were a bunch of people to make sure I kept him on the leash. Which is a real trick, since Bachus darts and runs, usually at the same time. So I got some cardio and amused looks before realising I had clipped the leash to the wrong ring. But since he is a good crazy dog, he came right back to me.

I am so spoiled by the very mellow Arnie, who doesn't respond to his name, but also doesn't run. When we would go hiking, he insisted on being the leader, which was funny, especially when I would take the lead. It made me a bit homesick for my Cville life, but meanwhile, I have surrogate pets and the world's most comfy couch (my butt was so happy when I finally sat on it last night. Squishy!).

Fuerzabruta

Stunning, exhilarating, visceral, creative. Phenomenological!

I have been dying to see De La Guarda since I found out that they had created a brand new show. Well, actually, I have wanted to see De La Guarda since the last time I saw it, back in 2004 with Villa Villa. So on my blink-or-you'll-miss it trip up to New York, I had to see it.

And it was totally worth it! Even seeing the show by myself was a total blast, because so much of the show is about collectivity and audience participation. I would say that the theme is "Breaking through the Boundaries." Guy on treadmill bursting through a wall of boxes, watching people just pass him by. A confined "office" exploded as 6 people dance vitally. A giant circle of mylar with people on either side. Two girls running across a mylar curtain that only heightens the drama with the different colors in the lighting. And of course, the water ceiling. Holy crap! Watching these girls skitter and surf across the water above, interacting with each other and the audience. Culminating in a big jump-around dance party.

De La Guarda single-handedly made me understand Phenomenology, especially in terms of theatre. It plays with all of your senses and awareness, forces you to use your body and interact. Feeds on the collective energy. The lights are very saturated and bright, occasionally strobed. You hear not only the throbbing soundscape, but the sounds of the mylar, the breath and stomps of the dancers. You smell the fog as it surrounds you. You feel the water, the bass, the other bodies around you. And the water ceiling makes you feel as if you are underwater, which is a unique physical experience. The show takes place in so many dimensions, in front, behind, above, etc, maximizing on the space. It is impossible to be passive.

Not unlike Blue Man Group, which I saw on my last night in Chicago. Something I had been meaning to see for ages, since I know Blue Men. Total blast. It was proscenium, but funny, unexpected, and visually exciting. It made you totally reconsider paint, PVC pipe and marshmallows. They used audience members, violated expectations and used rolls of paper and black light. It was genuinely FUN. In the same way that I stood agape watching Fuerzabruta, jumping around and dancing in the rain, I left Blue Man chuckling and thinking.

I love theatre like this. I wish I was that creative. Instead, I can just encourage everyone with a pulse to see it. Old people, young people, non-theatre people - everyone was getting into it! And if anyone wants to go, I will totally see it again.

on iTunes: "Beautiful" - Goldfrapp

People in the city

This is me waiting as patiently as I can for the NYPL to fill a 15minute request that I put in an hour ago. This is me distracting myself from my obscenely growly stomach that might get the rest of me kicked out. (don't make me regret not bringing the power pack)

I don't know what is taking so damn long. Did they have to fire up the Delorean? Or call in the Ghostbusters? I might not mind if I was allowed to bring my book in to read. If I had known it was going to take so long, I would have put in the request before watching Tango Argentino. MERG!

It's fun to be back in a real city, although as much as I like New York, I will always love Chicago more. It's been a few years since I've been here. Kicking into city-mode. All black, walk with purpose, don't linger in front of maps or chain restaurants. But as I stood on the subway platform, I discovered I left my ear buds in my car in VA. For some reason, riding public transit without my iPod makes me feel very vulnerable. And without a cell phone, I would feel naked. And I'm not sure when or why that happened.

Waiting for the train

This little NY adventure involved getting up at 6.30AM to catch a ride to the train station with my uncle. But the first train I could get doesn't leave till 9.35AM. So I sip my scalding coffee and enjoy the internet.

I don't even remember the last time I had to get up that early. Maybe when I was working in Chicago? All I know is that it is dark, and having two kitties on the couch with me made it all the more unpleasant to get up. That was nice though. In the middle of the night, after letting Jack out, I felt little paws on me, then I felt something warm against my thigh. Belle had curled up against me. And every time I moved, she just re-cuddled. It was great. And since Pandora had no one to play with, she slept by my feet. It only confirms how much I want to live with kitties.

Staying behind in NJ meant I didn't have to ride in the van with my dad driving, which is usually a pretty dicey proposition. Sitting in the van, with him blazing across lanes, I just turn back into a surly 17 year old again.

Another train bummer - 30th Street station has a Ben & Jerry's with 3 new flavors (all of which sound amazing), but for obvious breakfast-oriented reasons, it isn't open yet. Because unlike all the grownups, I would totally order a 3 scoop sundae for 1st meal.

Easter with the fam

For years and years, Easter was a major production. It involved new dresses, hats, an egg hunt (or stealthily hiding them), gnawing on Redstone bunnies, and permission to eat as much junk food as you wanted, because it was Easter. When you are 7, this is the shiznitz. Many moons later, things have changed.

It was family uniform to wear black pants and festive shirt. Last night we still dyed eggs and decorated cookies, but now the eggs are crazy colored with the occasional snark scrawled in wax. Found out that a couple Easters ago, the Fashionista ran over the Easter bunny. Well, a bunny, on Easter. The St. Joseph statue in Mom's garden has been decapitated, and I got really excited by coffee and soy crisps in my Easter bag (no more baskets).

The big transition bummer - no Cadbury eggs, which I look forward to for the whole year. Maybe in addition to the cheesesteak I want to pack for dinner (never been a fan of the Easter ham), I can swing by the CVS and pick up some eggs.

Train wreck

It should really be the name of our little rockband. Well, at least when I play the drums.

Smokin' Fairy finally procured Rock Band, which has been the agenda since it was generally agreed that Guitar Hero 3 was meh. And to celebrate Spring Break and the fact that none of us had a Damoclean deadline, we busted out the Rockband. Smokin' Fairy is a video game pro, so he was rockin' pretty hard. I do decently on guitar after months of GH, but I am absolutely, comically pathetic at drums. Like, impressively bad. Somehow, you put me in front of the little drum pads with sticks and I lose all musicality and physical coordination. This became a prime source of entertainment for everyone else as I threatened to smack them with drumsticks. But since my Little had similar issues, we made a rocking MA team, with me on kick and crash, and her on the actual drums. How many dramaturgs does it take you ask? Shut it, says I.

I got a little practice time in before migrating to G.Style's house for Lost. Then got a call from my "little" who was still in town, to our surprise, and wanted to hang out. There was some coordinating of pickups and packups, and then we all rocked out till like 3AM. Blessing or curse, the microphone wouldn't work, but we had the drums, and two guitars, which Smokin' Fairy described as the Fisher Price rock set. Or the set up for a band of midgets. Or Mini-Kiss! The Rockband playlist is awesome, and possibly superior to GH. Although that might be because I have nearly all of the RB songs on my iPod, and had to download alot of GH. (Although "Elephant Bones" and "Who Was In My Room Last Night" were happy discoveries.)

Now I lust after an Xbox.

Starting spring break

What a lovely feeling to wake up at noon and not feel guilty. To realise that nothing MUST get done today. Other than Rockband and Martini Night.

It's pretty nice, if still nippy out, so Smokin' Fairy and I walked to the dining hall to burn more of my meal plan. Great in theory, less great in reality. But their dining halls are way swank compared to the UC or Marketplace.

I think I will finish the tango book that Visual Bookshelf is hassling me about, maybe pick up some fiction, make travel arrangements, finish my SAMLA abstract and pack dirty laundry by dumping it through my sunroof. Or maybe I will sit on my butt and watch Firefly. Last night, I got to go out and see Be Kind Rewind and be generally social! Ah, choices.
Meanwhile, Chicagoist's list of "how do you know it's spring" amuses me, mostly with its accuracy.

Coffee shop hoppin'

In the death throes of winter quarter, I am seeking inspiration in new spaces and variations on the theme of caffeine. My apartment is littered with half-drunk cups of coffee, socks, and random refuse from junk food. But I am not really getting any work done at home. The couch is an evil seducer. It knows my weaknesses and preys upon them. (I refrain from assuming gender, which Kallisti made fun of me for, but mostly because I think it's up to the couch to decide how he/she participates in the gender spectrum.)

Currently, I am packing up to leave Perks, having finished a sexy smoothie. It's a little more polished than some of the other coffee shops. And it has like some of my favorite music on its rotation. Beta Band, Portishead. Stuff I loved a few years ago. But they close at 9. So I will be meeting people up at Donkey, where hopefully I will be able to just finish this paper. The first 5 pages came pretty readily. It's the current 5 that just aren't happening. I need to kick inspiration into overdrive.

Donkey has a distinctly different feel. And smell apparently. The stale smell of coffee, the rain, students who are wearing the same sweats for days. But it's hippie and homey. When I was wrestling with my absurdism paper, a trip to Donkey seemed to kick things back into gear so that I was able to finish. Here's hoping the same thing happens this quarter. How fabulous is it that for the week of finals, Donkey stays open 24hours!

Also fabulous: no damn Starbucks.

Ending the quarter

Nothing like tying up loose ends before escaping town for a few days.

• met with a playwright to discuss his work over coffee. fun, but it tapped into a style of analysis I really haven't used in a while. And I'm so busy deconstructing, I sometimes forget how to interact and process like a normal person.
• met with my advisor about teaching next quarter and my thesis. He seems very confident, and it's good that someone is.
• dinner at the dining hall with Smokin' Fairy. It sucks alot less when there is someone else. Although the temptation to eat crap is pretty high.
• sat in on Dali rehearsal before driving my "lil sis" home.
• working on grades, which is mildly depressing. At least I get to make it pretty in my spreadsheet.
• trying to remember where I stashed the Bullshit, because I have writing to get done.
  

How very high school

To say the least, I am very excited to finally be done with this film class and professor. I managed to restrain my comments on the evaluation to one notebook page, single-spaced, featuring the phrases "waste of my time", "difference between culturally-significant and personal taste", "not as advertised", "treated like high schoolers".

This last one really kicked in again today as I finished writing my final paper. Admittedly, I get to write about Priscilla Queen of the Desert, which is one of my favorite films. And I applied some queer theory to it. But the fact that I made a strong, substantiated, non-fluffed argument in 5.5 pages instead of 6-8 meant that I had to resort to high school tactics. Suddenly, I am playing with fonts and margins, filling paragraphs with extraneous adjectives and plot description. I have had to do this kind of crap since I was a sophomore in high school. It's just really frustrating, because with just about any other professor, especially at the graduate level, I am able to write something strong, succinct and just believe in the integrity of my writing instead of trying to cater to some checklist of how many sources, what font point size and margin maximums. Really, it's just insulting. Oh well, that's done, and now I can focus on much greater things.
on the tube: Cubs and Sox in pre-season

Variable Theremin Collaborative

(not me, because she was way graceful/cool)

How cool is this - I just "played" a theremin! By play, I mostly mean flail around a stage, but still cool.

Theremin: instrument with 2 antennae that react to movement. One antenna controls pitch; the other volume. And you play it without touching it.

But wait - there's more! It gets even cooler! This is an e-theremin! Developed by The Variable Theremin Collaborative, which is funded through Arts for Ohio in cooperation with the @Lab (which is chock full of cool tech toys and sexy computers). I have a rough idea how it works. There are two cameras to capture movement. The motion is put into a computer, multiplied and turned into mHz. Half of the stage is pitch, the other volume. But with two moving bodies, the computer regularly gets "confused" and averages the movement into a new sound.

Add to this a percussionist, a cellist, a violinist and a sound mixer.

It's this crazy synergistic loop! The dancers generate movement, which generates sound in the theremin. The musicians improvise based on the theremin and/or the dancers. Visuals are projected, generated from a feedback loop. And when the exterminate all the bugs, there will be a motion capture body suit involved! It's the ultimate in multimedia interaction.

(playing in the @Lab)

When it was my turn, I was up with an older guy who moved subtly. As I am very much not a dance soloist, I tried to react to him or the music (this is why I do ballroom - I am never the only person up there making an ass of myself). It begs to be played with/by contact improv-ers. When I watched the other people, including the trained dancers, I was much more interested when they interacted with each other or the music than in their own zone. I mean, all by itself, it was a cool dance performance. The music was a little crazy, but since I knew why, it was OK. And it was hugely apparently who was the senior dancer, since she was so much freer in her body, and had a much larger movement vocabulary. But junior girl gets points for pinch-hitting when the original dancer didn't show.

on Pandora: "That's the Way We Get By" - Spoon

Grad decisions

Oh the hilarity. Oh the irony. On the day that I mail my official documents to UCSB and Wisconsin, I get a letter from Oregon.

1. UCSB: Accept! I will be living at the beach for 5 years working with people who have an academic crush on me. I will be subsidized, since I was awarded the Regent Special Fellowship. woo!
   
2. Wisconsin: Decline. One of the best programs in the country, great and structured, but not as excited about my research. But I did receive a great fellowship and funding package.
3. Oregon: Wait listed? This was my safety school, not exactly on the mainstream radar of theatre or PhD, and they only waitlisted me. I laughed out loud.

I love that I had such great options to choose from, and that it is done. Now I just have to finish this quarter, write my thesis, finding something to do for the summer, then get rid of anything that doesn't fit in the Civic which me and mom will be driving across the wonderland that is Oklahoma.

MA Mischief

To celebrate our mentor's birthday, we 2 MAs decided to make a little bit of an event of it.

Last week, we all were forced to read Miss Julie by August Strindberg. It's a hateful play by a hateful man. But this was mitigated by the wonderful little webtoon - Strindberg and Helium. Grim, dour bearded Strindberg ponders the miseries of life accompanied by cheery, floaty, pink Helium. So I asked Smokin' Fairy to hook me in to the Baker sound system. After the quiz, she headed backstage, and I dashed to the soundbooth to play Helium. He was a couple flavors of confused; the class thought it was hiliarious. And then he turned around to find one of his MAs holding a bunch of pink balloons. Hee. And for our private Theory class, we had tiramisu.


It was fun to plan a little mischief, tapping into some of our more theatre-like talents. It was funny, because I got to the theatre and realised that I was wearing my blacks. It was also nice to do something fun for him, because he is such a great mentor and person.

Now I try to get excited about reading Deleuze and Guattari.

Pets by proxy

I love animals, but I have never actually have had pets of my own. Dustbunny and Scat were technically Cheese Fiend's, but having lived with them for so long, complete with feeding, cleaning up cat barf, and sharing the bed with them, I feel like they are my girls, too. I miss my crazy ninis, who I haven't seen since I moved away from Charlottesville. While in Charlottesville, I also had a dog by proxy, who I still get to see occasionally.

Since moving to Athens, I have other pets by proxy, even though I don't live with them. There is a feisty black dog, Fern, who lives in my building. It's nice to come home and be able to say hi to the dog while I dig for my keys.

Then there's Baccus and Catface, who belong to Smokin' Fairy. It's nice to go over there and play with animals. Catface kinda looks like Dustbunny, without the crazy. And Baccus is just nuts. There is another dog, Molly, who just looks so put upon. And when I helped Smokin' Fairy take Baccus to the vet, I feel like I was officially a pet-owner by proxy. He's ok. Had doggie pink-eye. But it was good that there were two of us, since he is so "friendly", you need one person to fill out forms and one person to wrestle with the pooch who just wanted to say hi to the little terriers and puppies and the severely anti-social Bull Mastiff. After an impressively quick appointment, we took the backroads, and I shared the front seat with him.

I can't wait to get my own animals. I am waiting till I make my next move, because the idea of sticking cats in a box for some hellishly long car ride, or trying to find someone to fly with them.

watching Mystery Diagnosis

PJ Productive

Perfect weather to hole up inside in PJs and just get shit done. It's snowing and blowing. There is a baklava of ice/snow/crap/repeat on all surfaces. But my apartment has a space heater, my squishy-addictive bed, and piles of things to be read, cleaned, sorted, etc.

Because I know better than to go outside. Walking home from the Gator was treacherous enough last night. Made some friends as the wiser of us opted to just walk on the street instead of sliding down the sidewalk. This made so much more sense: the streets are less trafficked than the sidewalks at that hour; since they are darker and warmer from the cars that HAVE driven on them, they haven't been as icy; as roads, they are more likely to be treated than sidewalks in front of frat houses. Oh, and the added bonus of not breaking your butt or going undergrad bowling (a bunch of staggering undergrads skidding down the hill on needs one person to slip and crash into all of them - STRIKE!) Also entertaining, the girls in capris and peep-toed stilettos. These girls have enough problems under the best of conditions (getting a heel caught in the cobblestone is hilarious for all the rest of us).

And I got home about 5 minutes before it started thunder-sleeting. Although it was a bummer to leave the scene early (there was much hilarity involving next year's Halloween costumes, a suddenly-appearing Mariachi band as emphasis, and other such).

on iTunes: "Beautiful Day" - the Eels

Worst of all worlds

It is totally disgusting outside. I am not sure how to describe the precipitation. It's wet like rain, cold, and painful like sleet, but coming down in big chunks like snow. All of the worst parts of what can come out of the sky short of frogs.

But it is excellent weather to hole up in a coffee shop and get postmodern. Which is a concept I think I actually get. Maybe because it is a lived condition rather than theory. Or because Facebook is such a great example of it. Or because it taps into my favorite modern art (or is it postmodern - like Dada?) Or maybe because I downed half of my dirty chai in like 10 minutes.

OK. Now I have to write a bunch of emails about teaching, work on my prospectus and write thank you notes. Thankfully, all of this can be done within the confines of my apartment, in my jammies, under the covers and parked next to the space heater.

Santa Barbara winds

When I finally got back to my apartment and crawled into bed, the thought running through my head was, "Well that was weird."

The short version: I was scheduled to be in Santa Barbara for 36 hours, 15 of which I spent doing UCSB crazies. All in all, it went very well, but I was/am totally wiped out.

The considerably longer version: Friday was the longest leap day ever, and not just because I gained 3 hours. Got up to team-teach the 271 class. It was fun talking about dramaturgy and our experience, being as laid back as we wanted. Sadly, when I got home, I realised I delivered that whole lecture with my fly down. *sigh*

But I couldn't dwell on that since time was at a premium. I had to juggle packing (no fashion panic allowed), with prepping my lecture and finishing my film paper. However, it did give me an excuse to skip the Spring lunchbag. Got to bust out my new rolly suitcase.

Drove to Columbus, which is like an hour an a half away. Unpacked my laptop to discover that I had totally forgotten to pack my power cord. Doh! I finished my paper, which I was happy to be done with. I HATE that class. Emailed it to Smokin' Fairy and got on the plane. Sat next to a very skinny Mormon who seemed to take up alot of my seat. I munched on my puppy chow and listened to the iPod. Turbulence was so crazy, it actually woke me up from my plane nap. Took a puddle jumper from Phoenix to SBA. It was really frustrating trying to find non-meat airport food, but I did find a bean burrito. Got into a breezy Santa Barbara around 9.30, waited for the shuttle and read my cyborg theory. Stayed up till midnight prepping my presentation.

My vampire hours helped me out with my CA schedule. But nothing could really help with the non-stop schedule. Didn't even get a chance to down my coffee or grab a muffin since there were already UCSB people waiting in the lobby. There were several rounds of introductions, divided into two cars, where I managed to spill my coffee all over the grad students new robot car.

Mini-conference: really interesting. Got to hear a variety of different topics from different people (current and prospective grads, faculty, etc). My tango presentation went over really well. Not hardcore academic, but engaging and fun. Especially after a super-dull presentation just before me. Got some great feedback which has me rethinking parts of my thesis (in a good way).

The scenery: OK. We had lunch by the lagoon. Yup, I said lagoon. It was beautiful, sunny. It is very hard to be schmoozed by faculty and still eat a sandwich at the same time. Didn't really get a chance to talk to some of the current grads to get the scoop. After the mini-conference, we all were toured around campus, but is beautiful and conveniently laid out. Saw my first coral tree, and had a chance to talk to the other prospectives. We split up again to drive around Santa Barbara (and get some caffeine), which Superguy, my new UCSB BFF, ordered with all of his Starbucks expertise.

There was another little reception, with awesome food and fresh pineapple. More chatting. Then Idiot's Delight, which was pretty, if plotless. We were taken back to the hotel around 11PM, and the lot of us did some debriefing in the lobby.

It is so weird to be courted, instead of trying to sell myself to them. I have decided that one guy needs to not come so that Superguy can. I liked UCSB very much, and it has alot to offer. But so does Wisconsin. I'm not really ready to make a decision, but how wonderful to have such a great decision to make.

watchin' some SVU